So we had to go in and out a couple of times, and we were just waiting around for ages and ages. Somehow, I walked from the sofa up to the bathroom and told my partner. My partner went out with him, wanting to see him. Everywhere you look, there are happy, fat, smug pregnant women. I've been incredibly lucky to have such amazing support from Sam, my mum, and close friends and family. It sounds crazy, but I just knew. Some people we talked to had not had a 18-20-week scan, either because their babies' abnormalities had been detected by earlier diagnostic tests (e.g. It is a noise that will stay with me for ever. Because we knew that that wasn't normal, that wasn't what we'd experienced before, it wasn't just the, 'There's the arm, there's the leg, oh look the baby's moving'. In this information, the word we refers to the NHS service that provides screening. Thick milky discharge at 14 weeks.tmi pic attached. The scan yet again confirmed things were not good, however the sac had grown. This scan takes place between 18 weeks and 20 weeks 6 days of pregnancy and is commonly called the 20-week scan. The first result, which tells you if the baby has Down's syndrome, is ready in three days, but the other chromosomal problems cannot be eliminated for up to three weeks. Some people had underestimated how serious any abnormality found at this stage could be for the baby. I wasn't ready to make a decision straight away, and I was told I could call them in the morning. ABDOMINAL CIRCUMFERENCE MEASUREMENT AT 20 WEEK SCAN. But the consultant had found more spots on the heart and the measurements were the same. Why me and not you, you bastard? I felt empty, scared, guilty and incredibly heartbroken. And so, yeah we got to, carried on with the pregnancy, kept seeing the consultant, kept sitting in the waiting room outside, because there was a terribly long waiting time sometimes, depending on what time you had the appointment. You're in and out and that was it. Our week-by-week PREGNANCY emails are a must for parents-to-be. Our nightmare began when I went for my 20-week scan. 10/03/2021 16:13, @Cormoransjacket I used to think the feeling of your baby kicking inside you and the sight of a foot poking against your skin were the most fantastic things in the world. This image shows a baby's face and hands at 20 weeks, and gives you an idea of what you'll be able to see at this scan. And, faced with feeling sorry for myself or feeling sorry for my child, I know which I'd choose. We walked all the way home. It seemed a very arbitrary system, and so you quite often sat outside in the waiting room for a couple of hours before you actually got to see the consultant, which was, seemed you know, I kind of remember thinking before we went in to see him on the particular day when we found out there was a problem, 'Why are we sitting here? As soon as we arrived, we were shown to this little room. I can feel my child kick, it responds when he shouts at football - I mean literally, this baby used to dance around whenever he'd like scream at a goal - and there cannot be anything wrong with this child because it's part of us already. It was another consultant, who said, "I'm afraid I have some bad news - your baby has Down's syndrome." The same anxious wait for a little, pathetic cry. And they took me to another room and they explained that the baby had what they thought was ventriculomegaly or something. We couldn't say we'd lost the baby, because he was still kicking away, but we couldn't pretend everything was fine, either. Life expectancy of 30 or 40. There is always a chance that a baby may be born with a health issue that scans could not have identified. We must have had one before that as well, we must have had one before that, but it came back quite normal. Sam squeezed my hand and told me it was ok. Still, the consultant thought things would be OK. So he was about two weeks smaller than what he should have been. And I went for, I went for a normal 12-week scan, at my local hospital and everything, they said everything was fine, there was no problem. We use some essential cookies to make this website work. Like many things, the theory is very different from the reality. As I was called for my scan I was nervous and emotional. Then I picked myself up. Sam reassured me, but the guilt had hit me along with the feeling that our world was falling apart. 2022. We, I was with my mum, and they scanned and found choroid plexus cysts on the brain, which is just a mark, it's a marker on the brain, it's a, what they call a 'soft marker'. On January 18, my baby was born, at 23 weeks - a little boy. He started to scan me with a cold expression, then told me, 'it didn't look good' and that 'my womb looked raggedy'. I did think it was a bit strange that she wasn't talking, and then she sort of said, 'Oh, I think there's a problem. It was, 'Oh we'll come back to that'. We had the same conversation, but obviously were not making any sense to her at all. And as soon as she said those words, both of us were like, 'Well what's wrong?'. Could you tell? I had to take a tablet there and then, under the supervision of a nurse, to end the pregnancy. The doctor told me he was 98% sure this was a failing twin pregnancy. How was that scan different from the dating scan? I was sat on the sofa working, my son was at nursery and my partner was in the bath. Sometimes a post mortem was needed to confirm the 20-week diagnosis to see if the baby had inherited a genetic problem (such as Fowler syndrome - see '. Despite this new discovery, the sonographer was still concerned. x. 'Soft markers'. I thought I was going to burst into tears. He was tiny, perfect and a Down's syndrome baby. I want to enjoy my son again, without any reservations.
All my instincts were to protect my belly, yet here I was allowing someone to stick a huge needle into it. My mum arrived early to look after our son, and my partner and I got a cab to the hospital. Do you have any thoughts about that? I was told this was common as my body and hormones still thought I was pregnant. I went home feeling crushed; Sam and I both felt helpless. There are no known risks to your baby or the mother from having an ultrasound scan but it is important that you consider carefully whether or not to have the 20-week scan. Perhaps because we are alone in this, it has brought my partner and me very close. He then told us what the prognosis would mean for the child. Many parents were shocked by findings from the 20-week and later scans. Severe chromosomal conditions such as Edwards' syndrome are now often picked up in the first trimester antenatal screening but itwill usually be more obviousat the 18- 20 week scan, though usually a firm diagnosis will not be made until one or two specialists have weighed up all available evidence about the baby - which usually means that another expert needs to scan the baby again, or until the woman has had an amniocentesis. Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommys Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. We had the baby cremated. Sam followed and I broke down. Sometimes doctors will wait to give the baby more time to develop and carry out repeat scans - this had confused several parents we talked to who had gone for repeat scans not knowing that the baby might have a problem. The first words I said were: "If there's anything wrong then it's my fault", I had been working 70, nearly 80 hours the previous weeks and pushed myself hard. The pain was excruciating, but nothing compared to how I felt inside. I think at that time she had come to terms better with the fact that this baby was going to be terminated, and I don't think I was quite there. Please ask your hospital about this before your appointment. I had no idea if we were doing the "right" thing. You may need to have a full bladder when you come for the appointment. No, we really didn't, with hindsight we probably should have, but not at all, it never occurred to us to be worried about it. Yeah - in, stomach, out. 15/02/2014 08:02. The same anticipation. It would be a personal tragedy for my partner and me, but that is all. Sometimes it is difficult to get good views of a baby. Only this time, no cry came. I wasn't unduly worried at all. I believed at this point I had miscarried, they wanted me to come back I'm for a follow up scan. Sometimes women were told that the sonographer had found a 'marker' or sign of a chromosomal condition and had to wait for an amniocentesis to confirm the findings. So I sort of went home quite, fairly kind of happy and I, at, at this point I hadn't any idea things could go wrong anyway. My wife turned the screen away from her. As I say, I'm not a very nice person at the moment. Thinking back, I don't know how we left without him. And they actually asked my husband to come in before they spoke to me. The sonographer will be able to tell you the results of the scan at the time. And I, and, I felt the weight of deciding what to do about it. Seated in the antenatal clinic with lots of expectant mothers with baby bumps. Read full disclaimer. You will then be asked to raise your top to your chest and lower your skirt or trousers to your hips. We didn't feel we could tell anyone what was happening. Wed like to set additional cookies to understand how you use GOV.UK, remember your settings and improve government services. But I still didn't want to be the one who stopped this baby's chance to live. And before they gave me any of the results she asked a colleague to come and told me she wanted to check something, with a colleague, and by then I was getting very concerned because I'd never had that happen before. When I think about how long it took them to deliberate ultimately, maybe not, but it just felt like a bit of a fast food situation, didn't it? Thankfully I was met by an amazing sonographer, she was compassionate and understanding. So and you could see the exomphalus, this little pouch, which was obviously just the intestines where they are. I hadn't thought about the mechanics of such a late termination, but had assumed it would mean some kind of operation. So carried on with the plans, and, you know, planning for the, another baby to come along and then we went for a 20- week scan which is obviously the big one and very exciting, seeing all the arms and legs and once again everything was going fine, 'Look here's the baby, here's the length of baby'. For example, some babies have a condition called open spina bifida, which affects the spinal cord. Having the scan does not hurt but the sonographer may need to apply slight pressure to get the best views of your baby. The doctor explained the options I had to manage my miscarriage. So she said, 'Come back on Monday. Some hospitals do offer earlier anomaly scans of the baby, but they will not show as much detail as scans performed between 18 and 20weeks. Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here). It was probably all right but hadn't had any fluid in it at the moment. I then found that soft markers means 'vague unproven suggestion of a link', and that echogenic locii are small concentrations of calcium which are incredibly common and harmless. Several parents said they would have preferred being told something, even it was vague. We'd sort of put those discussions to the back of our mind, and then all of a sudden there are other abnormalities so yeah it was a bit a bit of a shocker [laughs]. It is also sometimes referred to as the mid-pregnancy scan . I felt I needed proof of what was wrong before I take such a huge decision and that I couldn't do it based on what someone had written on, on the paper. You've had your, you know, you've had your triple test and everything was fine. As though I went power mad for a week, killing my innocent unborn child, and now I am tainted for ever. Christmas came and went in a blur of emotion, it felt so wrong to be celebrating when we were in such turmoil. My partner's face was lit up, seeing the baby for the first time. An appointment should be arranged as soon as possible and ideally within three working days. I think I was about 20 weeks cos they, the hospital I think did the 12 and the 20, that was their standard thing and, yeah, so I got the 20 weeks one. And I thought that if I were faced with the possibility of having an amnio, hours of discussion would follow - I would spend days mulling it over. But here I was, minutes later, lying down, waiting. However, a few hours later there was another shift change. I was another one who did get bad news at the 20 week scan. You get extra care and monitoring as appropriate and baby is proactively treated. We're still not at the end of our journey, but we're much further along. And it's like, I really wanted to see it and I didn't, and it was it was very mixed. The baby was very, very small. We didn't name him. Rather sharply, my partner tried to explain. So we'd gone through the Down's syndrome or worse scare, we'd had conversations about what we would do, if it was confirmed that it was Down's syndrome or another syndrome, another sort of chromosome abnormality. I faced another internal scan where I began to feel helpless and alone. Entering the labour ward, I waited for someone to say, "Go home, you are 16 weeks too early." The sonographer then passes a hand-held probe over your skin to examine the babys body. Could she possibly have something that's not been detected? I was becoming numb to the whole process. You will be able to discuss this with your midwife or consultant. She didn't want to see the baby. No one else felt him kick. So that was it. At this point it wasn't looking great. And I can, the words that the scanning member of staff used, "Everything's fine", will stay with me forever. And, it does not occur to you in the slightest. I was told that while bad news at the 12 w scan is often of the life or death kind, bad news at the 20 week scan is often of the 'needs an operation in childhood' or 'needs to wear a brace for a year' kind. He was sure the consultant on Monday would see that the measurements were completely normal and that there was nothing to worry about. I wrote a few things down last night when we were trying to go over things, just to remind myself. Looked exactly like our two year old as a baby. Have I misunderstood what's going on?' It was horrible. My partner tried to remain calm, and at my request rang my mum. The 18-20 week antenatal scan and further tests. I wanted to let nature take its course. He wanted to talk about it, but I didn't. Can you remember that minute. the amniocentesis) and the pregnancy had already ended, or because the scan was not routinely offered in their region 5 or more years ago. We went in, had a scan, I can't remember the exact sequence of events because the baby was still in the wrong position. How common is it for 2nd baby to come early..? I didn't think my instincts were worth much. DS had 2 soft markers: talipes (club foot) and 'echogenic locii' somewhere - heart I think. We had to discuss what we wanted to do with the little body after delivery. I thought surely everything is ok, as they couldn't detect twins the week before. . 1. If you are not sure, you can contact them and ask. This article was amended on 24 November 2015 to anonymise the writer. Which she reassured us that she'd be absolutely fine, this was a one-off. I guess the morphine made it easier. [Husband] couldn't make it. Eventually, the doctor finished the scan and said that some of the baby's measurements were very small. We saw the consultant, who was reassuring, saying that he would rescan me and was sure everything would be fine. I had no issues at my 20wk scan with DD - and neither did any of my antenatal group (9 mums). The anomaly scan, also called the 20 week scan or mid-pregnancy scan, is used to detect pregnancy irregularities significant in diagnosis of any of the following conditions: In most instances no serious issue will be found during the scan and many parents-to be will come away knowing that all is progressing nicely and, perhaps, having found out .